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  • Tanya Patterson

They are not your Boots

We are all walking or own path, or running our own race.

Regardless of how you look at it, it says the same thing - You need to wear your own boots and stay in your own lane.

This one gets me really fired up as I learned at a young age not to worry about what others were doing. The very reason someone else is succeeding and you are not could very well be because they remain focused on their own goals while you are flipping lanes wondering what everyone else is doing. We all have our own lives, our own issues and our own ideas, life is hard enough keeping them all on the right path without involving someone else's business. There seems to be so much concern about what the rest of the people around us are doing that we forget about our own lives. If you water your own grass it could be equally as green as your neighbors.

“Did you ever think to take a hot second and really look into what is holding you back?”

With social media so readily available in our hands it is super hard to avoid seeing the things that go on around us and not compare our lives to someone else's. These comparison are often borderline judgments of how others are doing things or not doing things. First of all what gives us the right to judge? And second how much farther along your path is judging getting you? Bottom line is the energy we are putting into these comparisons are directly taking away the time we could be using to build our own lives and relationships.

“If you take the time to water your own lawn it will be as green as your neighbours.”

Let's get a little more real.....sometimes our judging and comparing goes beyond social media and these individuals we are judging and worrying about are people close to us; family members, co-workers, friends. By finding fault in these people, fault in ourselves is easily ignored. By worrying about how they live their lives, how they treat their loved ones, raise their children, how they keep their space, we are redirecting the attention from our own lives.

Sam's house is a mess, her kids go to school with lunch and homework done but sometimes their socks don't match and they have wrinkled clothes. Her son Jimmy's snow pants have been needing to be mended for weeks. She talks of date night with her husband so clearly she has time to do these things and if they are spending money going out then surely she could buy Jimmy new pants. Sound kinda familiar? What you don't know is that Sam and her husband had been having trouble. Sam decided to take the time and effort and put it into her marriage so after work when they both get home Sam and her husband spend time together and do the extra chores on the weekend instead of after work. They go on date night twice a week and are finding a new love and appreciation for each other. So Sam's kids may go to school with wrinkles in their clothes but they will have happily married parents instead of having to endure a divorce. Jennifer, who was busy judging Sam, has a perfect family on social media. She takes the time to make sure everyone sees perfection and she is the first to notice when someone else's life is not. What you don't see is that Jennifer's husband is having an affair. While Jennifer is worrying about everyone else and creating the illusion of a perfect life her husband is tired of being ignored so he has found someone who pays attention to him. Jennifer is not happy with her own life and the more unhappy she gets the more she judges and finds fault in others.

Those were two extreme examples, totally fiction examples by the way, to get my point across.

My Point

The only way to evolve and become the best version of yourself is to stay focused on yourself. Find your goals and your mission and stay in your lane. You will be astonished at all you will accomplish and the clarity you will have when your attention is on only one person - you. It does not matter what others are doing, where they are at in their lives and how they run their circus. They're not your monkeys, Not your Zoo.......they are not your boots!

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